The Story: Platinum Edition

Written by Many Forum People

Once upon a time, there was a little boy named Dave and he got eaten by a shark. He came back to life with a miracle. When he came back, he suffered from intense amnesia. He went to the emergency room at the hopsital, where he died. And due to his illness, he does not remember his own name. But the baboons came and restored his memory. However there was an evil baboon that was plotting to destroy Dave with his evil powers. Then the NuTang crew came to his rescue. But the evil baboon overpowered the NuTang crew, leaving the confused Dave to fend for himself. Papagoya popped up out of nowhere to take Dave to his secret lab, where Papagoya restored Dave's memory and gave him super powers.. and a lightsaber. There, he trained as a Jedi and became familiar with the power known as PPGY, a.k.a. the NuTang Force. As his training progressed, he met a little green guy named Master Yoda. Master Yoda kicked everyone's ass. Master Yoda said, "Dave, for your first training excercise, you must run to the store and get some meat for a sandwich." Then Dave said: "But Master, I'm not hungry." Master Yoda then took out his lightsaber and challenged Dave to see who would go to the store. As the duel started, Dave jumped up, raising his blue lightsaber high in the air. Yoda and Dave battled all night but at midnight, 10 baboons suddenly appeared. The baboons sat down to enjoy the show, placing bets on who would win. As the baboons watched and jested towards the fighters, Dave seemingly caught Yoda off-guard and made a quick slice at the Jedi Master, unsure of weather he actually injured the little green creature or not. As Yoda died, Darth Maul came and said "You might beat the old green guy but can't surpass me, let's du-du-dual." Darth Maul took out a Glock, and said "You wanna be a gangsta?" Dave and his NuTang crew came with tanks and missles ready to blast Darth Maul's head off. But Darth Maul pulled out his deck of Yu-Gi-Oh cards and had all his little minions destroy the tanks and missiles. A mysterious helicopter appeared, apparently trying to help Dave, but it fired tear gas onto Dave, while revealing the Xanga logo on the side of the copter. Later when dave woke up, he talked to some people to get connections and had North Korea drop a nuke in Xanga's base. There were no survivors. Dave felt remorse that he had committed accessory to murder, so he had to kill one of his own NuTang members to redeem himself; However, he did not know who to choose. Instead, Dave walked up to fanying and smacked him upside the head saying "They're trying to create a damn conflict, stop solving the problem so easily!" After smacking fanying, he asked fanying who to choose, and fanying said "eXiled." Then fanying and eXiled lived happily ever after on a small, desert isle, until one day, when Dave showed up, chanting a Czechoslovakian vengeance hymn. Hahahahahaha! And then eXiled went crazy and threw a coconut at Dave. Then when the coconut hit dave, it bounced off and the coconut broke into two, revealing the key to NuTang.com. Then a little hairy protista somersaulted into the scene and snatched the key in its slobbery mouth. Dave took the hairy protista and locked it up into a cage, bringing it back to Papagoya's lab. Papagoya and his lackeys performed surgery on the hairy protista to remove the key, but when they cut it open, a HUGE hairy protista came out of it, like a clown coming out of a wind-up car. Dave did some research and found out that hairy protistas were being controled by Xanga, but now since Xanga is dead, they have gone out of control and went crazy.